Author: Coach


Hi there! Hope this finds you well and thank you for checking out this hopefully useful collection of thoughts on the key concept of attitude. In life coaching, key concepts are the basic building blocks for personal growth and overall success. Some people use only a few key concepts; some people learn and practice many more. So, let’s focus in on the importance our attitude plays in personal growth and overall success.

How does our attitude affect the day-to-day decisions we make in our lives? After all, it’s our decisions, that to a high degree, determine how our life turns out. For example, if our attitude in a moment in time where we need to make a significant decision is negative, what can happen? Well, we will most likely procrastinate or sabotage the situation and let that opportunity which we may never get back slip away. Thus, mastering our ability to control our attitude can really help us capitalize on those opportunities and increase our chances of leading a more harmonious, successful and happy life. The great thing is, that we have the ability to do this because it’s a learn-able skill. Viktor Frankl, the author of Man’s Search for Meaning said, “Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” As you may or may not know, Viktor Frankl was held captive in and survived a Nazi concentration camp in 1944-1945. If you want to look further into his viewpoint on the importance of attitude towards circumstances in life, I suggest reading the book.

Another example that comes to mind of how attitude can positively affect our success in a situation and even those around us, is that of NBA all time great Michael Jordan. He was quoted as saying, “my attitude is that if you push me towards something that you think is a weakness, then I will turn that perceived weakness into a strength”. I think he’s a man of his word. Although he wasn’t pushed into having the flu, on June 11,1997, Game 5 of the NBA Finals, Michael Jordan put on a display in that game that could have only been catalyzed by a positive attitude. He wound up having the flu that day, but having the attitude of a winner, he did not let it stop him. It would be one of those games that went down in sports history and has been dubbed the Flu Game. He played in that game and contributed 38 points, 7 rebounds, 5 assists, 3 steals, and a block while struggling to the bench and downing fluids to revive his weakened body at each timeout. The Bulls went on to win that game and take a 3-2 series lead, where one would think the Jazz might have had the advantage with Jordan not being 100%.

I guess if we’re challenged with something that we feel we can’t handle, having a bad attitude about it will very likely lead us to avoid it. Conversely, if our attitude is that this challenge will not stop me- that attitude can be the catalyst for taking action, growing and conquering that challenge and make all the difference in creating success in our lives. read more

In today’s life coaching article, I will be writing about self-talk and mental programming. Throughout our lives, we have unknowingly received countless negative programs, which are recorded in neural pathways in our brain. This is similar to the programming of a computer. These negative programs were created by negative input. Parents, friends, teachers, television passer by conversations. You name it. (Behavioral researchers have estimated that in the first 18 years of our lives alone, each of us is told no, or what we cannot do, or what won’t work, more than 148,000 times.) And it doesn’t stop there. We continue to receive the wrong kind of programming from others, and from our own old negative programming from the past – our own self-talk.

The Law of Repetition

We receive our programs through repetition. First, from others, and then through our own repeated self-talk. That’s why what others tell us most becomes what we believe about ourselves most. Each time a message is repeated, it gets rerecorded, in the brain, and becomes stronger. Unfortunately, a lot of the programs we got were the wrong programs.

How Self-Talk Works

While we’re growing up, we get “programmed,” every day in dozens of ways. Everything we hear, see, or experience in any way gets “programmed” – much like programming a computer, which means it gets recorded in our brain. Also like a computer, the part of the brain that records all of those messages doesn’t know the difference between something that is “true” about us, or something that is not. Our computer brain just records the programs as we receive as “truth” – and those are the programs that determine every choice we make.

So we grow up getting “programmed,” – in a very natural way – and a lot of the programs we got about ourselves were completely wrong: (“You can’t do this,” “You’re not good at that,” “You could never do that,” “Why would you do that, it won’t work for you,” “You’ll never be good at math,” “You’ll always be a ‘fatty’,” “How could you be that stupid?, ”Can’t you do anything right?,” “You never listen,” or “Who do you think you are, someone special?”) And there were thousands more programs, just like them, that we heard, recorded in our brain, and ended up unconsciously repeating to ourselves and, ultimately, believing as truth.

To know what our old “Self-Talk” does in our lives, all you have to do is listen to the “negative” self-talk of the people around you. You may have even heard yourself say some of these things, or you may have heard these kinds of comments almost every day from someone else: “I can’t do this!,” I’m no good at that,” “I can never remember names,” “Nothing ever works for me,” “I can never lose weight,” “It’s just no use!,” “I never get a break,” “I just can’t seem to get organized,” “Today just isn’t my day,” and on and on and on.

Now imagine having a new internal language of a new kind of Self-Talk – a new set of programs. A new “language of life.” A new, more positive, more successful picture of yourself, one that you believed in, every day. That’s what listening to right, new kind of Self-Talk is designed to do. That’s what it does. Self-Talk replaces old programs about ourselves and actually records new programs in our brain. read more